Day Nineteen
I am sooooo tired today. These radiation treatments are really starting to take a toll on me. AGAIN I didn't exercise today. I get up every morning with the intention of being active. After I put the baby down for a nap, I'm wiped out. Even as I type this entry I'm on the verge of passing out.
Today I had to meet my ex on my way to the hospital. He forget to put my stroller back in my car so I wouldn't have to carry that 90lbs car seat. My little punkin' doesn't feel so little anymore. Anyhoo....seeing my ex is so painful and upsetting. I hate him. I've never felt so much hatred for any one person before. It's not because I want him back or anything. Everytime I see him it reminds me of the time I wasted, and how sick and twisted he was to me. I just want him to disappear from this earth. If anyone can grant me this wish I will be eternally grateful. So after that brief meeting that made me feel even worse...that sucked even more energy out of me.
Ok so Thursdays I connect with the doctor, and we discuss any side effects I'm suffering from, and how I'm feeling...blah blah blah....and I get weighed. I'm down another 4lbs. I'm glad about that but not surprised. I can barely eat any solid food. That brings my total weight loss so far to 10lbs. It would be nice if I could continue at this pace. Come May or June I'd be super cute. I doubt that will happen though, especially since there's no physical activity involved. A girl can dream can't she?!!?
Today I had a meal reaplacement shake made with 12oz skim milk, and a whole banana, I didn't eat lunch (bad Brn Honey!) and for dinner I had a junior steak burrito from El Famous. Not exactly the healthiest thing, but I miss fast food so badly. I won't be eating this again. It was a pain to eat. I had to chew soooo long just to get the food to a consistency that wouldn't kill my throat! GRRRRRR! And as soon as I finish this post I'm headed to the fridge for a sugar free popsicle.
Today I had to meet my ex on my way to the hospital. He forget to put my stroller back in my car so I wouldn't have to carry that 90lbs car seat. My little punkin' doesn't feel so little anymore. Anyhoo....seeing my ex is so painful and upsetting. I hate him. I've never felt so much hatred for any one person before. It's not because I want him back or anything. Everytime I see him it reminds me of the time I wasted, and how sick and twisted he was to me. I just want him to disappear from this earth. If anyone can grant me this wish I will be eternally grateful. So after that brief meeting that made me feel even worse...that sucked even more energy out of me.
Ok so Thursdays I connect with the doctor, and we discuss any side effects I'm suffering from, and how I'm feeling...blah blah blah....and I get weighed. I'm down another 4lbs. I'm glad about that but not surprised. I can barely eat any solid food. That brings my total weight loss so far to 10lbs. It would be nice if I could continue at this pace. Come May or June I'd be super cute. I doubt that will happen though, especially since there's no physical activity involved. A girl can dream can't she?!!?
Today I had a meal reaplacement shake made with 12oz skim milk, and a whole banana, I didn't eat lunch (bad Brn Honey!) and for dinner I had a junior steak burrito from El Famous. Not exactly the healthiest thing, but I miss fast food so badly. I won't be eating this again. It was a pain to eat. I had to chew soooo long just to get the food to a consistency that wouldn't kill my throat! GRRRRRR! And as soon as I finish this post I'm headed to the fridge for a sugar free popsicle.
posted by Brn_Honey @ 9:14 PM
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