Day Sixteen

Today is day sixteen of my supposed diet. I have been doing very very poorly. My heart is just not in it. Today I wrote out schedule for the week. I'm hoping this will help the cause. I didn't weigh myself today. I forgot and by the time I thought about it, it was very late in the day, and had eaten 2 meals already. I will weigh myself tomorrow. I'm sure I'm at the same weight or more. I may have to re-think my goals....I dunno, we shall see.

Day Nine

The week has still been sort of trying, but better than last. I am grateful for that at least. I have a ton of reading a homework to catch up on by Thursday. I can't bring myself to open my books even. On the diet front....well I could have done a whole lot better than I did. I did way too much emotional eating. I cheated 3 days this week. I did manage to drop 3lbs. I'd been going to kickboxing, so I'm sure the physical activity kept my metabolism going. All I can do is do better this up coming week. I really should start journaling my food intake. Doing that ususally keeps me on track. I also want to step up the exercise. Right now I'm only working out 2 days a week. I'd like to add 2 more days for a total of 4. Then from there I'd like to up it to 6 days until I hit my goal weight.

Once AGAIN here are my measurements:

Waist - 48.5 in
Bust - 49 in
Hips - 51 in
Arms - 16 in (lt and rt)
Thighs - 30.5 (lt and rt)
Calves - 17 in (lt and rt)

Milestones

♣Sweetest Day - 280 lbs
♣Anniversary - 260 lbs
♣Christmas - 235 lbs
♣My Birthday - 210 lbs






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New Start

Well I'm back. I really need to get myself together. I've been doing nothing but slacking off since my last update in May. I've gained 12 lbs! NOT GOOD! Between being stressed, and trying to go to school the pounds have begun to pack on. So I decided to re-commit myself to loosing weight. To date I'm 186 lbs...YUCK! I have a very aggressive weight loss goal of at least 25 lbs by November 10th. I ordered NutriSystem. I only have 5 weeks worth of meals. I'll decide whether to order more after that time. It sort of costly...well costly for someone that doesn't have a job...LOL! I'm looking for a jump start. I don't know what to do to get myself motivated. I don't want to do anything but sit around the house and sleep. I have no energy nor the desire to do anything. I'm barely making it in school...in regards to keeping the motivation. I'm afraid I'm going to fail. I don't know how to break out of this depression. I've never been so sad in my entire life. Sometimes I moments and/or a short stretch of time where I feel like I'm making a breakthrough. But then BAM! Something happens, or someone reminds me of my hurt...and I spiraling again. I been like this for well over a year now...and nothing has changed. How does one even break a cycle like this?